Squirtle, Wartortle, Blastoise
It’s time for the original water type starters!
A perfectly serviceable cartoon turtle. I know it’s like super obvious for water type to be blue now, but a blue turtle is kinda fun. I like how Squirtle is pretty consistently a bit of a bastard in the anime and other renditions. I think I remember you could knock one into a Mankey in Pokemon Snap? I’ve always liked Squirtle. It reminds me of my brother and also that I still have an ancient bouncy ball with like a little toy version embedded. Cute little dude. In Gen II, its signature move was apparently Skull Bash so have fun imagining a headbutting little turtle.
Wartortle is cooler than Squirtle cuz it has fangs and ears and a tail? Pretty standard for the 1st gen mons to just get a little edgier in the second stage. However, there’s also some mythological references here, namely the minogame, a turtle so ancient, it has a trail of seaweed growing on its back. In the Pokedex, it is expressly regarded as living for a long time, and may even grow algae on its shell. As you’ll see, I really dig Blastoise, but I also really like how often you find evidence that pokemon may live long lives without ever evolving. It feels like evolution is a natural progression like with metamorphosis in insects and frogs - but it’s cool to get the sense that evolution is still weird, still not fully explained and not exactly a given in any pokemon’s lifespan. The idea of a wizened Wartortle showing up some upstart jocky Blastoises is pretty fun.
BIG BOI (gender neutral)!! Blastoise is sick. Tank turtle is cool. I like the ears and the boxiness - almost reminiscent of an ankylosaurus (but not as much as some later mons) while still maintaining a pretty unique vibe all around. I know Blastoise originally came from another evolution line they sort of kitbashed together, so the sudden appearance of built-in bone guns can be forgiven. As a kid, I definitely just accepted that this dude got guns for no reason. I’ll still accept it, honestly.
As far as the mega evolution goes, I don’t like the brow and pointy chin change. The single cannon is sweet and the little arm shell guns are funny in a good way. It’s weird that it evolves to looks more robotic. One of the things I like about the normal version is the combo of weirdly mechanical weapons on a mostly organic looking turtle, so I don’t love the beetle borg-y vibes here. The arm shells kinda balance out my criticisms tho.
All in all, the Squirtle line is really fun and cool and solid and nice. Oh wait I forgot about Gigantamax.
This took it a little far. It’s like… funny. But minus a half ball for trying too hard.
Overall a very cool fam.